I’m practicing…

This past few winters I have been learning to cross country ski. I know what you’re thinking…”What’s there to learn? Put on skis, slide across snow…”

Yeah, that’s the picture of myself I had too. Then I tried it…and fell…and fell. These were not little failures: they were big, ungraceful, obvious ones (I had bruises to prove it). I didn’t like it. It was hard. 

I survived the first day…and then my husband suggested we go again later in the week. Ugh. The last thing I wanted to do was go out there again in the cold and fail more.

I was in the LEARNING ZONE, and it wasn’t fun.

I think of our kids. What do we tell them when they’re in the learning zone? 

I didn’t want to hear, “Just keep trying! It’s easy!” That would have made me think, “What’s wrong with me that I can’t do it?”

Hmm.

Instead, one of my kids actually told me something that shifted me from dread to drive. He said, “Mom, you’re practicing! I saw you go from unbalanced when we first started to handling the turns at the end! You’re focusing on the failure as an end already…cut yourself some slack!”

He was right. I wanted it to be easy already. I wanted to look like an Olympian when it was literally my first time trying.  Framing failure as a normal part of practice changed my attitude immediately. When he framed it that way, I  was able to tell myself, “Yeah, I can go out and practice more! I should go and see how much I can learn and improve!”

Our children/students need that. Framing failure as part of practice will help them re-engage when things are challenging for them.

Did I bundle up and try again? Yes, I agreed, and I am still a skier-in-progress. But I learned much more with my son’s wise words – and I will keep PRACTICING!